Happy Poopin

Will produce something substantial later, its 2:10am and I think I have piles.

The Sun is Melting my Lego.

Lego is one of the best things the human race has ever created, up there with the Rubix Cube and memory foam mattresses. Most of yesterday evening I spent embroiled in battle with the Lego pieces hunting them down and adding them to my creations, its among the most relaxing things to ever do, the possibilities are endless. In time you become one with the Lego and things rapidly form, I created a spaceship and the front end of a harrier jumpjet, my housemate; a badass robot that turned into a plane. Pretty cutting edge stuff. The state of zen I was in was a welcome escape from the stresses of life, perhaps Lego should be included in spa packages. Blocks of Lego could replace those silly cucumbers and you could bathe in a pool of molten plastic, great for the pores. People say that Lego is just a kids game, which isn't fair as the adult version is the construction industry and its hardly the same thing, I'll stick with the bits of plastic.


Today in my lab we were given a group task for the next couple of months, and we had to fill out a team skills self-perception questionairre. This is the Belbin Team Roles theory which suggests what team roles you would fill . It turns out I probably shouldn't be in a team at all considering I scored 4 for 'Team Worker' which is atrocious. Worse I scored 0 for Investigator, which is a shame as I'm stuck with being Watson to everyone else's Holmes. There is a Simpson one on the internet where you are allocated a character, I'm not going to try it as I will probably get Milhouse. The group work is about urinary tract infections, word on the street is that Cranberry juice helps prevent them. Which could be good news for Ocean Spray, so we have some experiments to devise and bacteria to count. I have cleared a spot on the mantelpiece for my Nobel Prize.


Sunshine, its a fantastic movie. Not enough people have seen it and its a damn shame, the basic premise is that our Sun is dying about 50 years in the future, A device has been created that is meant to be detonated inside the sun to reignite it thus saving our future. A previous mission disappeared and a final mission are on their way, and this is where the film begins on a spaceship closing in on Mercury. Its pretty fantastic the entire way through. Stars like our sun have an impossible beauty, and true comprehension of its sheer power would leave me in a vegetable like state being fed Bovril through a tube, and its this realisation that makes this film so epic in sense. It is well acted, and suitably sinister when it needs to be. The score is also amazing, one of the songs is called Surface of the Sun, and if you get suitably intoxicated, and put this on, you can be physically pleasured, its better than Vegas with a suitcase full of cocaine. Actually that's ridiculous, nothings better than that.


Before bed I'm going to get the Lego out make a spaceship and fire myself into the sun.

This is where a title goes.

Day no. 8523 of my life, things are going swimmingly, I have eaten two tins of peaches and 3 oranges since awakening an hour ago. The taste sensation of an orange is hard to describe, citrus explosion? they do kind of explode in your mouth, like a segment of miniature capri sun's. I could eat oranges all day. They are full of healthy things like citric acid, which unlike nitric wont melt your face like a Cambodian man pissed at his wife. Jests aside acid attacks are pretty horrific, the victims come out of hospital looking like the monster from Pan's Labyrinth, except the eyes arn't on the hands, they are halfway down their face sloop. Oranges are real good for hangovers and I am currently experiencing one, its mild the worst is over, I find the first 15 minutes when you are lying in bed and your mouth tastes like the floor of a industrial rave the worst part, once liquid and oranges have been consumed your on the rapid road to recovery. Some people suggest things like Alka-Seltzer and shit, these people are wrong, motherfucking oranges yo.

I'm glad the hangover is almost through as I have a lecture soon, on Biochemistry, incidentally the hardest module of my course, I had an exam a few weeks ago and even though revision was achieved, I would rather take a boating holiday off the coast of somalia than do another one, although I am sure the weather would be exemplary, and with an exchange rate of 2475 somali shillings to the pound, my meagre funds would go a long way. Obviously there is an issue with being kidnapped and if I fought back, torn to pieces like those guys in Black Hawk Down, that was a good documentary, Tom Sizemore was in it, and I have time for Tom Sizemore, the man was in Heat and Saving Private Ryan, I'm also aware that he beat the shit out of Heidi Fleiss, Its a shame he couldn't beat the ugly out of her. 

Over time you will notice that my blog will actually contain nothing of value, I've been attempting to think of a point or a general theme to it for the last few days, but have come up with nothing, I imagine it will contain my thoughts and ramblings about life and whatever is going down in it. Gripping stuff I know, my life is like riding Space Mountain at Disney on all the truffles in Amsterdam. I have just discovered whilst browsing imdb that Tom Sizemore was also in Pearl Harbour, fuck that film and fuck Michael Bay, its the popular opinion to hate him, but come on that was one of the worst films, Cuba Gooding Jr was the best thing in it, but unfortunately for the film he is black and they didn't really like black people back then, so he realistically couldn't of had a bigger part. Michael Bay is on his way to redemption in my eyes however as he cast Victoria Secret model Rosie Huntington-Whiteley as Megan 'faux' Fox's replacement in the third Transformers film, which will be as shit as the first two but twice as faptastic. I was shown a video of her getting her boobs out for a photo shoot yesterday, they are pretty excellent. I tore my jeans.

Hilariously It has taken me 40 minutes to write this, So I'm going to make bacon and eggs and have a fourth orange, I fucking love oranges, and my mouth still tastes like a homeless man's drugrug. 

peace x